Need Help for Infidelity? Think Carefully Before Turning to Family
What's the problem with turning to family or friends with help for adultery?
Well, what if you and your spouse are able to sort through all this pain and mess? Let's say there's a chance you could recover, and actually get closer! What if you both learned from your mistakes and tried to reconnect? When you"re ready to heal with your partner, it would be really tough to deal with your sister's, mothers, or friend's resentment to your spouse. They may not forgive your spouse for how he or she treated you, even if you do.
When you and your spouse come to a solution that works, family and friends that love you can continue to have negative thoughts after infidelity. Your spouse will always be labeled a "cheater" in their eyes. This added burden won"t help you effectively learn how to cope with adultery.
The greatest problem with cheating is that people have all or nothing thinking about affairs. For all kinds of emotional reasons, infidelity feels like a deal-breaker for lots of people. As a result, you'll get all kinds of extreme advice that just complicates matters, and once again, fails to actually offer you effective help for adultery.
Dealing with your family and friend's emotional reaction towards your spouse is an extra burden. Choose help for adultery that will be strengthening, offer workable solutions, and some peace of mind.
Consequently, impulsively turning to family or a close friend can create a whole new host of problems. You honestly don't need to deal with other people"s "opinions" right now.
Even more, although you're upset and enraged with your spouse, many married couples still don't want to humiliate their partners. Yes, you certainly feel embarrassed, used, and humiliated too. But, beneath all that pain, there's likely a part of you that doesn't want to totally expose your partner's guilt to the whole family. In fact, that part of you is thinking pretty clearly.
You cannot control other people"s feelings or negative thoughts about infidelity. No matter how many times your partner proves that they"ve changed, loved ones don"t let it go as easily.
When you ask a loved one with help for infidelity, they cannot experience the entire process of healing that you and your spouse experience. They mostly remember their friend or family member hurting from your untrustworthy spouse. See how this creates more problems for you?
Bottom line...Right now you need more than a friend"s advice to address infidelity. As an infidelity expert, I provide real help, clear steps, and solutions to show you how to get through infidelity.
I look forward to serving you, bringing a smile back to your face, and getting to healing!
Your Coach, Kimberly
Kimberly Talley operates a Life & Relationship Coaching private practice in Maryland. She offers working solutions to singles and couples facing scores of challenges with dating and marriage. Kimberly serves as a Counselor and Adjunct Professor at a Maryland college, leads workshops, and offers teleconferences and private coaching services to people nationwide. Kimberly can be reached by phone at 301-875-5019 or by
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