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How to Tell Your Kids You re Divorcing

Divorce is very, very difficult to deal with. However, most would argue that having to tell your kids is one of the most difficult aspects of the entire situation. You know that it's going to break your child's heart and you know how hard it's going to be for them - but you have no choice but to tell them. This hurts a parent very deeply, but there are some different tips that can help you out. Check out the information below on how to tell your kids you're divorcing.

Protect Your Child's Feeling of Security

One of the things children tend to think when their parents are getting divorced is that they are losing their family or that they are in some way not going to be safe. This all has to do with the feeling of security that children build up with their parents, their home and their situation. When something suddenly changes, like parents get divorced, they can lose a lot of that security. One of the things you need to do is reassure your children that you will always be a family and that they are going to be safe. Let your child know that you will always be their parents and that everything is going to be alright.

Whose Fault Is This?

Another thing children may tend to think is that the divorce is their fault. While this is an irrational thought, it's also normal for children to feel this way. One thing you can do is assure your children that it is in no way their fault. You should also never let them in on any details of the divorce - children should not have any part of the adult matters. This is because you can influence the way they feel about you or their other parent. If you speak negatively about your ex spouse in front of your children, they could end up resenting you for it. It is also traumatizing for a child to hear negative or nasty things about parents that they love. Explain to your children that the divorce is no one's fault and that it's just time for a new situation.

Extra Time and Attention

After you have told your children that you will be getting divorced, it's important that the children get extra love and attention from both of you. This will help them become more well-adjusted and will help them build back their security in their family and parents. Encourage your children to spend more time with their other parent and you spend more time with them as well. Do things they enjoy doing, read to them nightly before bed or do something else that will establish a comfortable routine and allow you to spend time together.

Although divorce is never easy and it's certainly not easy to tell your children that you're getting divorced, these tips can help you out. Discuss it with your spouse and work together on a plan that will help your children feel more secure and well-adjusted with the divorce.

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