How to Stop Your Divorce

It is safe to say that no one gets married to end up getting divorced. We stand there, taking our vows seriously... in sickness and in health... for better for worse... until death do us part. Still 50% of all marriages in the United States ends in divorce. If you are concerned that your marriage could be headed in that direction or you and your spouse have already talked about it, and you want to prevent that from happening, here we are going to give you a few tips on how to stop your divorce.

How to Determine if you are Facing a Divorce

The best way to determine if you are facing a possible divorce is to pay attention to your relationship. Talk to your spouse, don't nag or hound them... but talk to them. Pay attention to their needs and desires, they way they are with you. The more distance there is in a relationship the greater the likelihood a divorce could happen.

I have known couples that have fought and argued for years, telling each other that they were going to divorce as soon as the kids were old enough and when that day came... one of the spouses was still surprised that they were facing a divorce.

I have known other couples that seemed happy, seemed to get a along, seemed to have a wonderful marriage... even to people that knew them very well... end up divorced.

The Steps you Need to Take to Mend your Relationship and Avoid the Divorce

First you need to understand that both sides have to want to make the marriage work. It can not be done by one spouse alone, it will take a commitment from both people. Here are a few tips to help encourage that commitment.

1. Listen to your spouse. All to often the spouse that is told by the other that they want a divorce is dumbfounded and can't believe that anyone would want to divorce them after all they have done for their spouse. Guess what, you aren't perfect... no one is. Listen to what your spouse has to say, there is a reason for them feeling the way they do.

2. Don't beg and plead and argue. You don't wan to appear pathetic and weak, those are two very unattractive qualities and they are not very persuasive. It is important for each spouse to understand why they are this point in their relationship and see if they: 1. want to make it work and 2. if they can make it work.

3. Talk do not accuse. The moment you start throwing accusations is the moment your spouse is going to stop listening... and you are going to cement in their head that divorce is the best option. Talk to each other. If you have to write it down first then do that so you can communicate in an amicable manner.

How to Put your Marriage on a New Track so You won't Divorce in the Future

As odd as it may sound... date one another again. There is a reason that the two of you are married, somewhere deep inside the two of you are the tow people that fell in love with one another. Life has a way of making it easy for us to loose track of those people... take the time to find them... discover who it is you are today and get to know each other.

It really isn't a matter of working on your relationship... it is building a relationship and maintaining that relationship that prevents divorce.

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06 Sep 2008 03:13:24

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