Love Your Neighbor - Can We?
When we attempt to love our neighbor, it seems to be us vs. them - it doesn"t quite work. If our neighbor is good looking, then of course we might love him or her in another way, but that really isn"t love, that"s something else! Actually, loving our neighbor as ourselves takes a lot of. . . something. It"s not simplistic at all. Without deep feelings of empathy, of compassion, we can never hope to love our neighbors, because in this shrinking world, our neighbors now include all of humanity. In order to love our neighbors, we must get over things such as jealousy, fear, and hatred. We must work on these before we can love our neighbors.
So how do our religions help us here, other than give us some commandments to follow? Christ and the Buddha looked at everyone equally - beggar or rich man, prostitute or king - and they taught them all. No discrimination. We should do no less, for if we don"t, this indicates that we are caught up in our own importance, our own egos, and this is a ticket to hell for sure! But where are the instructions on how to do this daunting task; love our neighbors? The commandment doesn"t help, it"s like saying to a child, "Be good!"
We try to follow our commandments, but "Turn down that stereo," is what we are thinking as we scrunch up our faces and convince ourselves that we love our noisy neighbor. Sorry, this just doesn"t work, and we are just kidding ourselves if we justify our actions by saying that we are works in progress, or some other rationalization. When we look at the situation seriously (this commandment), maybe for the first time, and ask ourselves what is really involved here, we begin to see the complexity of our circumstances. We begin to realize why we have never been even remotely successful in following this commandment.
What would it take to forgive, regardless of the sin committed? Christ did that. The Buddha as well. What made these men so different? Why can"t we be enlightened like them? This is the real question, and one that must be addressed before we can surrender, and love our neighbors. God must have thought that we are capable of enlightenment, otherwise why the commandment? And He must have known something, because the Buddha proved that an ordinary man can indeed become enlightened. Typically, we fight our neighbors; either they do as we say, or we eliminate them! Simple. But this is not following our commandment, so why would God saddle us with such a burdensome mandate? Apparently, God felt that we could do this, that is; become enlightened, just like Christ and the Buddha. The Buddha would say that enlightenment involves transcending oneself, and if we can pull that off, who would still be there to hate his neighbors?
If the individual self disappears, then where are the extreme differences we seem to create amongst ourselves and our neighbors? Here is where religion has fallen short, giving us commandments but concealing the real instructions on how to fundamentally change ourselves, so that commandments are no longer necessary to discipline our behavior. An enlightened being needs no rules; rules are necessary when we aren"t sure how to act, but when we act from wisdom and compassion, the rules are followed automatically, even if we've never seen them.
Some religions explain this whole idea of perfecting ourselves better than others. Some say just believe and you"ll go to heaven, (even if you hate your neighbor we can assume! If that"s the case, throw out the commandments and create a new cult!) Some actually explain the measures necessary to refine oneself, but few in any religion see the necessity of perfecting themselves; they believe that they are good enough, and this could be wishful thinking of an overblown ego and surprises could be in store! Think about this; "Love your neighbor as your "self." If your understanding of your "self" changes, then loving your neighbor as yourself will change as well.
Few go deep enough to actuate a personal transformation, and this is unfortunate because this is exactly where our deepest satisfaction lies. When we can truly love our neighbor because we see no difference between them and ourselves, we have experienced self-effacement, humility, and the attributes of Christ and the Buddha, and this is where God planned us to go - not mindlessly worshiping things that we feel are beyond our understanding and reach. If we can go deep enough to approach this dissolution of "self," we become unselfish, and this is the only way that we can truly love our neighbors. When we no longer have anything psychologically to protect, like our "selves," then it can happen; this is the only way that it can happen, and God in Her/His wisdom must have known this, and given us something really lofty to shoot for. . . eternity.
The beginning of the end of "self," is when we decide to sit quietly in meditation or contemplative prayer, with mind stilled. (The "self" hates this!)
Copyright E. Raymond Rock 2007. All rights reserved
E. Raymond Rock of Fort Myers, Florida is cofounder and principal teacher at the Southwest Florida Insight Center, http://www.SouthwestFloridaInsightCenter.com His twenty-eight years of meditation experience has taken him across four continents, including two stopovers in Thailand where he practiced in the remote northeast forests as an ordained Theravada Buddhist monk. His book, A Year to Enlightenment (Career Press/New Page Books) is now available at major bookstores and online retailers. Visit Source: http://ezinearticles.com/
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